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Why do Men Flee at the Thought of Saying 'I Love You'?

Why do Men Flee at the Thought of Saying 'I Love You'?

You can say Te amo in Spanish, Je t'aime in French, Ich liebe dich! if German does it for you. Or you can simply say 'I love you'. If you're a woman, you may be having nightmares trying to make your boyfriend say those three powerful love words. Try noticing how your guy runs when you quiz him on his reluctance to saying these words. And there are those other men, who've learned to push a girl's buttons by using these words shamelessly. You've seen this type. They'll endlessly say, 'I love you honey', 'I love you more than the whole world', 'I love you so much', 'I'm so in love with you that I can't live without you', and on and on, without meaning a word of it. These are the Love Rats. But what's with 'I love you', and why are women so hung up on hearing their men utter them. Why men hesitate This hesitation is male instinct. Men sometimes feel that admitting their feelings for a woman is a sign of weakness and dependency. So, they'd rather show love through actions. And these loving or caring actions are a substitute for the actual words. So compliments, presents or being there in a crisis are signs that a guy's really into you. But he just doesn't want to say 'I Love You'. What I love you really means to a man is I choose to act lovingly towards you. But are actions enough? A woman should be able to see her man's feelings through his actions. And VJ Randy Gunns says, "Personally, I say those words a little too often. Men aren't too com comfortable at expressing emotions. They're brought up with very macho emotions. It's not that they're more afraid of commitment than women. I'm sure in the comfort of their own private space they're able to express their emotions somewhat adequately. Men freak out when expected to show their affections publically. Maybe, that's the reason, they substitute poetry and thoughtful gestures with cheap Valentine's Day cards." Fear of rejection But does the modern, metrosexUal man also shy away from expressing his love for a woman in words? Model Steve Buckner feels he doesn't. "For the young men in cities it isn't a problem saying 'I love you'. But I can understand how it could be difficult for the conservative and traditional man. He might feel foolish saying the words thinking that it will make him look weak." Also men, like women fear rejection. Actor Jack Dorson says, "I've been apprehensive about telling a girl I loved her when I was younger. And I think the reluctance was due to my being shy, also I was scared she'd say no. I don't have problem anymore. I'm sharper and am able to gauge how a girl feels about me." Adman Roger Elliot also feels he was more reluctant say the words when he was younger "I was more idealistic then, " he says. "And there was this sense that I had to mean the words before I said them. Now I'm older and less idealistic and I've learned that women really want to hear these words. So like all men, I may on occasion be tempted to say them to get with a woman, " he says. Girls don't go there! Should women say the magic words, instead? "Never, " advices Roger Elliot. "If you've have to tell a guy you love him it's probably premature, and when you tell him he's going to feel trapped. So if you want to retain control of the relationship then manipulate him into saying it first. Stick to your strengths." But actor Jack Dorson feels it would be great if women were to take the pressure of a guy and say the magic words first. However in his opinion it seldom happens. Balance the love game Many men don't appreciate the power of saying 'I love you'. A woman wants her guy to say the words because in this way he acknowledges his attachment to her and the fact that he needs her. It's a woman's most basic emotional need to know how her man feels about her. Sadly, problems arise because men say the words so rarely and women place undue importance on hearing their men say the love words. But the magic words can save a relationship when it hits rock bottom, or can even get you out of trouble. But bear in mind guys, it's okay to say it when you mean it, but not so often it has no value. As with all things it's important to find a healthy balance. The secret to keeping the love words powerful and meaningful, is to refrain from abusing their use. Then they are the ace in a guy's pocket when he needs a winning hand. Visit love-lectures Love-Lectures to get expert advice on men commitment issues, know the real reasons love-lectures relationship/get_man_to_commit why men won't commit, love-lectures relationship/understanding_man. understanding men, and learn how to make your man ready for a relationship.

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